#DearWhitePeople - A Reflection on Relationship

In the last post I wrote about how the movie Dear White People is about identity. We unfortunately place our identities in faulty things when the truth is that God is calling us to place our identities in Him.

This movie is also about RELATIONSHIP.

A majority of the movie centered on relationships that were rooted in deceit, pride, and prejudice. These relationships were never based on authenticity, humility, or reconciliation. Only at the end of the movie do we get a glimpse of all three merging into any relationship. That moment came when Sam, the main character of the film, opens up to her boyfriend about her struggles with her dad battling cancer. In a beautiful moment, Sam is open and honest with him at the same moment he realizes that he needs to humbly listen and comfort her. When both of those happen in tandem it become clear that reconciliation is occurring.

So, the main question is this: Are your relationships marked by authenticity?

So, are our relationship with one another marked by authenticity? Most people feel like being completely authentic with someone is impossible, for one reason or another. Maybe the fear is that they won’t accept you. Maybe the guilt you feel is too heavy to be forgiven. Maybe you feel like it’s not a big deal and it’s no one’s business.

Trust me, the best relationships I have today are due to a reciprocal authenticity with the other people. Just the other week I was sitting in someone’s living room crying about how I feel like no matter what I did I would not be accepted and that I am a disappointment. This painfully beautiful conversation was the beginning of a reconciled relationship between a brother in Christ.

"We believe the best about one another. We wade through the worst with one another.”
- Pastor Kevin Larson

No one in Dear White People is ever completely authentic to who they are until the end of the movie, and even then there is only a flash, a glimpse into authentic relationship.

You guys, do not wait until the end of your story to be completely authentic. Being honest with someone is hard, but the rewards of being honest are a kind of unity that only comes from loving, being loved, forgiving, and being forgiven.

As important as being authentic with others is for your life, being authentic with God is eternally more important. God already knows how flawed and imperfect you are, and that’s exactly why Jesus needed to die on the cross to forgive your sins. He needed to rise again to defeat Satan, sin and death. He already knows you - the real, authentic you. Place your faith in Jesus. He was perfectly authentic - sinless, full of grace, and full of mercy.

Being authentic is to be done by faith. It is to be done in God’s grace. It is to be done among God’s people, and it is to be done on mission to share the good news of Jesus with the world.

God is good and gracious

Jacob Luis Gonzales

#DearWhitePeople - A Reflection on Identity

Well, if you are looking for a mindless movie to see in the theaters, Dear White People is not the movie to see.

Ali and I ventured to a small, local place on Saturday night to see the directorial debut of Director Justin Simien, Dear White People. This self-proclaimed satire on race, ethnicity, and identity is set in the present tense; this movie is uniquely and profoundly perfect for today - not yesterday or tomorrow, but today. The movie is focused on four main characters that round out the movie to intentionally display the experience of being black in America. 

As interesting and compelling as each character was to watch, I believe that there were three themes that need to discussed. In my perfect world, I would have the time to investigate each character to properly communicate the intricacies of their experience throughout the course of the movie, but we live in a fallen world so these reflections will have to do.

This will be the first of three posts on Dear White People. I hope you enjoy my perspective and my desire to lovingly discuss important things in the movie, your life, and my life.

This movie is about IDENTITY. 

The moment when it became evident that this movie is about identity happened in a conversation between two of the main characters, Troy and CoCo. CoCo has taken on a new name because of her fear of ridicule of her birth name Colandrea.

Troy: “Is that what you want… to be famous?”

CoCo: “I want everyone to know my name.”

Troy: “Which one?”

This simple moment was profound due to its weight not only on CoCo but on each individual in the movie. Now, I could break down each character’s struggle with identity but I think that might take a year to write about, so for now let’s make it directly personal.

What is YOUR identity? Who are you? What would you say makes you… you?

You place your identity in something. This “something” could be a boyfriend or girlfriend. It could be your talents or skills. It could be the approval, acceptance, or love of someone in your life. Or it could be your race and ethnicity.

The problem with placing your identity in those things is that they will eventually let you down. Those things are not worthy of your mind, heart and soul. They will destroy you in the end because they are not designed to be all-sufficient. They were designed to be enjoyed, but they are not designed to be where we find our deepest joy. 

When I was growing up all I wanted to do was play baseball for the Chicago Cubs by the age of 25. I had it all planned out, but my plan never had a chance. I can’t remember a night when I went to sleep growing up without my body hurting, my body was specifically weak in my knees. That might not seem like the biggest deal, but here’s the thing: I was a catcher. I needed my knees. I needed strong knees and a strong arm. I had neither. When I was a Junior in high school I was indirectly told that if I kept catching as much as I was, I wouldn’t be able to walk at some point in my life.

I was a catcher… but what was a gift from God, I treated as if it were God. Being a catcher was my identity. Being a baseball player was my everything, but God didn’t want me to place my identity in a gift from Him. God wanted me to placed my identity in Him. It took much longer for me to realize that’s what He was doing, but now I can say that it needed to happen so that I would see how nothing would give me the satisfaction, hope, and joy like God can.

Only God is all-sufficient, so he is calling you to place your identity in Him and Him alone.

So, how does the movie play a part in this? Well, each character believes that there are certain parts of their lives that they need to be hidden. Some do this out of fear of ridicule, some do this to not be the stereotype, some do this to overcompensate, and some do this because of the pressure to fulfill someone else’s image of them. 

In the movie, as well as in America today, people believe that what makes them truly themselves is their race and ethnicity. But, the sad part about this is that being one ethnicity or the other is not meant to be our primary identity. Being Latino is a part of who I am, but it is not everything. Being a Christian is what drives me to appreciate God creating me as a Latino man, but I don't view my race and ethnicity as the point of my creation. The point of my creation is to glorify God in my life for Him.

We live in a fracture world with a lot of hate, prejudice, and division, but I trust that God’s plan for the future will come to pass. Only through the good news of Jesus do we see that one day in heaven there will be people “from every nation, from all tribes and peoples and languages” worshipping together (Rev 7:9). That is such a beautiful picture of the unity of all people while still remaining diverse in people groups and languages.

As I conclude the first reflection on Dear White People, I hope to restate my main point: Only God is all-sufficient, so he is calling you to place your identity in Him and Him alone.

God is good and gracious.

Jacob Luis Gonzales

Dear White People - Review Coming Soon

Hello,

It has been a while since I have written much of anything on the website due to the transition in work schedule, but I plan on writing very soon. I hope to be writing a review on the movie "Dear White People."

I have been looking forward to seeing this movie for some time now. At first my motives were of to reinforce my anger and resentment, but now I believe that my intentions are to learn and loving discuss major issues brought up by the movie. I hope that I will reflect on the movie with a righteous perspective that is used to build up my readers. I sincerely look forward to seeing what comes out from my writing.

Look for this post to come out Tuesday November 4, 2014 at 10am. 

Make sure you comment on the post and let me know what you think.

Thanks!

God is good and gracious.

Jacob Luis Gonzales

everPresent Review

I was honored to be a part of the Stream Team for everPresent by Jeremy Writebol, and I learned quite a few things about myself through the process. Here is a short list of things that stood out to me:

Be Present, Right Now

Jeremy starts off the book by setting the stage for why and how we are to be present in our lives today, and I know that this is super helpful and challenging for anyone who reads it. He says that we reflect our omnipresent God by being present. Seems simple, right?

Don’t overanalyze this: “The method is: be present, as a Christian, with lost people (Page 8).”

Christians are not to live in a separate and solitary place all by ourselves. We are to be presently engaged and involved in the places that God has us. Not only are we supposed to live our lives right where we are at, but we are to do so around those who are not professing Christians. 

Don’t doubt that God has you right where you need to be. God has you present in an area for a purpose.

God Sends Us

You are not where you on accident or by mistake. God has you directly where He wants you to be. In fact, He actually sent you there. 

Why are you where you are? Why has the Father poured out wonders of love and grace and mercy upon you? Why has he come to relocate your broken life? It's because he has sovereignly sent you to live as his Kingdom people. He has placed you in the city to live an ordinary, everyday life as a citizen of the City of God, inviting others to the King (Page 81). 

Do you doubt this? So have I, and sometimes I still do.

My wife and I were planning on leaving our college town immediately following graduation, and we desperately wanted to move far away. I was in the midst of looking up jobs in Chicago, Louisville, and even Indianapolis. After having conversations with some close friends, a lot of time in prayer, and hard conversations with my wife we decided to stay. 

My wife has had a hard time, but over the time that we are living life in our city because we are learning to trust God’s providence and control over our place of residence and life. God sent us to this town. God wants us here. He is going to do big things because He is good and gracious to us all.

Are We Content?

We are truly content with where God has us? Do we trust God’s plan? 

This does not mean that we are comfortable and don’t actually share Jesus with the people around us; it actually means the exact opposite. If we truly trust that God has us where we are currently at, we will strive to be faithful in our homes, our workplaces, our hangout spot, and our cities. We will be faithful to His call to boldly share that Jesus is the Son of God, He lived the life we couldn’t, died the death we should've, and rose from the grave so that we could be forgiven and reconciled to God the Father. 

Content does not mean comfortable. Content means a deep trust in God’s plan for your life. Content means loving that God is the One in control. Content means handling trials with patience and faith. 

Are you content in Jesus Christ as God, Savior, and King over your entire life?

Jeremy Writebol wrote a great book for anyone who wants to dive into how to be a Christian in our daily lives. This has been one of my favorite books that I’ve read in a while, so I definitely recommend it.

God is good and gracious.

Jacob Luis Gonzales

#JesusisGreater - Review

This morning was the official release of the new book by poet, speaker, and - as of today - author Jefferson Bethke. The book is called "Jesus > Religion: Why He Is So Much Better Than Trying Harder, Doing More, and Being Good Enough."

I met Jeff last year at a speaking engagement he had at the University of Missouri here in Columbia. He did a couple of his famous poems that included "Why I Hate Religion , But Love Jesus." That particular poem was received well that night, but the poem received commentaries from all sides. Atheists were talking about it, Agnostics were talking about it, Muslims were talking about it, Jews were talking about it, Christians were talking about it... Everyone was talking about it. The discussion that this poem and video created was encouraging to see because people were talking about Jesus. This book is a follow up to his poem, and I believe that there are three reasons that everyone should talk some time to read this book.

1. He is Honest and Authentic
Jefferson Bethke has to be one of the most honest and authentic writers of my generation. He is honest about his battles with fighting against lust, which can be incredibly difficult to share in a book that will get tons of attention. Also, he is open about when he grew up in poverty and how he passionately loves his openly gay mother. His honestly about how the disagree yet they love each other is inspiring and convicting.

He even speaks about how, as a Christian, he still struggled with lust all the way to the point of sleeping with an ex-girlfriend. This is how he described his feelings afterwards:

I’ll never forget the feeling when I got home. I felt hollow, sick, dirty. I was a Christian now. I knew better. I wasn’t supposed to do that anymore! On top of that, I felt even more shame because I had planned what I did and had many opportunities to say no. I’d never had this happen before, and I’ve never had it happen since. The shame and guilt were so palpable that I literally became sick. I stayed up until six o’clock that morning throwing up, feeling so dirty and worthless and thinking I had completely failed God and that he must hate me now. (page 133)

When was the last time that you read a Christian author explicitly tell you the low points of their lives? When was the last time that you read someone open up their lives for their readers to see that they aren't perfect and above the point of the book? Probably never.

Jeff's ability to convey a sense of vulnerability and a sense of strength at the same time displays how Jeff trusts in Jesus' righteousness and His work on the cross. Even thought Jeff openly says he struggles with self-righteousness - which most of us do - but his clear dependance on God's work is evident throughout each chapter of the book.

2. Created For Discussion
It is obvious that this book is for discussion because at the end of the chapters are lists of questions that could be discussed or answered on your own. I found the questions insightful and helpful for each chapter, but I found his writing style probing me to ask my own questions.

Jeff talks about a time his girlfriend broke up with him and how he struggled with suicidal thoughts. He dives into why he struggled with those thoughts:

My worth, my identity, and my satisfaction were all wrapped up in her, and when I lost control of the situation and control of her, it felt like my god was being taken from me. That’s the truth with any idol—it will rock you to your core when it leaves. When a good thing leaves you, it might make you sad. But when an ultimate thing leaves you, you feel like you can’t live anymore. (page 115)

My first thought was, "What, if it left my life, would drive me to think I could not survive without it?"

I immediately felt convicted about two things that I needed to repent of: money and control. I am currently talking about these things now, and I pray that I overcome these idols and start worshipping Jesus rightly.


3. Jesus is Proclaimed
One clear thing about this book is that Jeff talks in depth about how scandalous God's love is for us. I'll let his words speak for the messages he wants to convey:

God doesn’t hide sin. In fact, he put it on display two thousand years ago in a splintered T-shaped piece of wood. Jesus came down to earth, lived the perfect life we never could have, and died the death we should have. And every drop of blood that poured from him was another drop of love falling on us.
Have you ever felt like your sin should be paid for?
It has been. 

All our sins.
All our filth.
All our guilt.
All our shame.
(Page 135).  

The minute we trust in Jesus, our standing becomes his standing. We no longer represent ourselves; Jesus represents us. Our faith isn’t earned. It’s counted. When we trust in Jesus, God then looks at us the same way he looks at Jesus. Even when we mess up, God looks at us and says, “Pure, spotless, blameless, perfect, holy, my child, you’re free!”
That’s what changes a heart and what stirs us to worship.  

That’s what changes someone’s life.
You don’t have to keep trying.
You don’t have to hide your sin.You just have to trust in Jesus who exchanged himself for you at the cross. (Page 137-138). 

The word worship is defined by glory and thanksgiving. We are worshiping when we give glory to something. Whatever we give glory to, we sacrifice for. Sometimes that’s sex; sometimes that’s our jobs; sometimes that’s our reputations. But we all worship something, and we all put pseudo-gods on the thrones of our hearts. 

When Jesus died on the cross, he completely reversed this curse, allowing God to retake his proper place as the one true God of our lives.
(Page 168).  

Go out and buy this book. I know that I saw Jesus in a new light and in a new way, and I know that if you commit to reading this with an open heart that God will shatter what you thought it meant to love God and follow Jesus Christ.

God is good and gracious.

Jacob Luis Gonzales